Crabicurious.com presents the 2017 Movie Ranking Roundtable. Also check out Zack's piece and Robert's piece. Take it away Bryson:
By Bryson Beach
Wow. It’s been a while since I’ve done this whole Crabicurious thing. I may need a tutorial on how to write a blog. I could make up a lie and say that I’ve been uber busy with work, a bustling social life, and successfully managing Harambe FC to glory, but you all know I’m a lame. After receiving some undesired feedback on my hilarious Valentine’s Post, I hid in shame never to be heard from again! That’s also halfway a lie. I’d make a helluva politician.
Despite my shame, I did find time to sneak out of the house and watch 25 different 2017 releases this past year because I love spending $1000 at local cinemas every chance I get. Anyway, 2017 is over yada yada, it sucked etc., etc., 2018 is my year blah blah. Here are my top movies of the previous year!
5. Split
This was the second film I saw this year. The first time I heard about the movie, my friend Benno expressed how crazy the trailer looked. Then I saw the preview I thought “Oh darn, Professor Xavier (James McAvoy) is going nuts!”. My expectations were soon tempered when I found out the film was directed by M. Night Shyamalan. He hadn’t directed a good film in what seemed like decades. The Last Airbender wasn’t completely terrible, but I just couldn’t shake Marky Mark talking to plants in The Happening.
The story of the film was very fine. The real strength was the performance of the aforementioned McAvoy. For one actor to play so many different personalities and characters within one physical vessel was outstanding. It went beyond the distinct accents used for each, but the little subtle facial expressions and mannerisms were award worthy. There was one scene where McAvoy switches between multiple personalities in one scene and despite not changing clothes or turning away from the camera, you’re convinced you’re watching several different actors. The film also did well to build up to its supernatural. It was teased and teased, but did not rear its head to the film’s climax which I really have to commend the director on. I’m so in on the sequel which ties in previous Shyamalan film, Unbreakable.
4. Wonder Woman
I’ve been accused of being a DC sympathizer. Batman vs Superman wasn’t the cluster critics would have you believe (Though the portrayal of Lex Luthor was an absolute disgrace), and Suicide Squad was entertaining. While I liked those films, they still fell well short of the classic trilogy of Batman films Christopher Nolan brought us. That is why it was so refreshing for director Patty Jenkins to absolutely knock it out of the park with Wonder Woman.
Of course, there had to be pressure to nail a big budget superheroine film whether that’s fair or not. I wasn’t sure how Gal Gadot would do when she was originally cast, but I was very pleased. The story worked well for an origin story despite the character being previously established in Batman vs Superman. Gadot masterfully showed the growth of a naïve amazon princess finding her way in a foreign world full of men and war. Of course, I’d be rude to exclude her co-star Chris Pine. His character, Steve Trevor was the ideal vehicle in helping Diana Prince become Wonder Woman. There was humor, character growth, riveting action, and that kick-ass Wonder Woman theme first introduced in Dawn of Justice, what more could you want? Patty Jenkins should just direct all the live action DC films depending on how good Aquaman is…
3. War for the Planet of The Apes
Back in 2011, Rise of The Planet of The Apes came out. I thought “that looks dumb, Hollywood always out here remaking stuff after the already remade it with Marky Mark!”. One random evening, my roommate at the time, Drew, brought it home. We watched it and I had to retract my harsh pre-judgement. It was pretty good and I was all about whatever the sequel would be. In 2014, I may have even taken a Friday off work, just so I could go to the theatre when it was scarce, so I could lock into Rise of The Planet of the Apes. Despite it being a movie largely comprised of primates communicating through animal sounds and sign language, I thought it was one of the best movies I had ever seen. I must have watched it a dozen times on whatever HBOGO login I had secured when it hit streaming!
It wasn’t unfamiliar territory to find a time with a scarce crowd to watch the third and potentially final installment of the reboot, War for the Planet of the Apes. The crazy thing is, this is in the conversation with being as good or better than the second film. Caesar’s swan song did not come without heartbreak and redemption. Here I am, a human, rooting for the human antagonists to meet their fate. As the film endured, I couldn’t help but think about the adorable little Chimpanzee James Franco cared for in the first movie, the same monkey that was initially ostracized by his own kind as outsider. To see the hardened, grizzled leader he had become in the third film, forced to carry the burden of being unable to protect a wife and oldest son, was very emotional.
While apes were the “good guys”, we say a struggle of the main character, Caesar, in a constant struggle to regain the humanity that made him so special in the end. Woody Harrelson played the perfect sadistic heel to foil the apes. His character wasn’t completely black hearted, as we were given ample background to why he became so dastardly. Matt Reeves directed the last two installments of the series and if he can summon the same magic he found with the Apes series and Cloverfield, there may be hope for Batfleck.
2. Get Out
Stay woke, fam. Wow. I didn’t know Peele had it in him. The first time I heard of the film, a friend shared the trailer on Facebook. I couldn’t tell if it was serious or a spoof. I appreciated the concept. There’s few things in this world nervier than meeting your significant other’s parents for the very first time. The only thing even more testy is when it’s an interracial relationship. If you don’t know anything about me, I’m black. I tend to date outside my race more often than not so this film is literally my nightmare scenario. I was so spooked I nearly gave up on white women for life! (That’s a joke).
Never the less, the premise of the film was very unique. One of my favorite things about the film was all the subtle referrals to racial injustices and inequalities, we may not even realize. There were also tons of references to stereotypes between and misconceptions between the races. There were several things I didn’t catch the first time through (yes, I saw it twice).
While I’ve never been happier to see someone eviscerate a middle-aged therapist mom in my life during the film’s conclusion, there was something else that made the film amazing. I’ve discussed the symbolism throughout the film, but Chris’ best friend in the movie, Rod (Lil Rel Howery), killed every scene he was in as the comedic conspiracy relief. It wasn’t overdone, and kept things lighthearted amidst tense moments. I love that the movie was very suspenseful without being a truly gory horror flick and the best part was a happy ending. Unless you’re a racist! Then you definitely took an L.
1. Logan
It wasn’t easy picking between the top 3, but my top film of 2017 was Hugh Jackman’s final portrayal of Wolverine in Logan. It’s insane for me to think that the first x-men movie came out in 2000. The whole franchise has had some up and downs, but this may be the crown jewel.
While most would say Wolverine is the role Hugh Jackman is known for if pressed, the man has some serious acting chops outside of the comic book, action realm. My mans was on Broadway winning Tony Awards. I feel as if this film allowed him to incorporate more of his dramatic acting ability than he had in any of the previous installments. Tasked with the burden of taking care of a broken Charles Xavier (Patrick Stewart), facing his own mortality, and being forced into an unfamiliar father role, the Logan character faced a unique set of challenges that provoked different depths of character to surface.
The choice to loosely base the film on the Old Logan storyline was vindicated. The more important choice was to let the film flourish under an R rating. Wolverine and Laura aka X-23 were liberated to be as violent and bloodthirsty as they needed to be in disposing of their foes. It was something that they weren’t shy about either as we saw during Laura’s first encounter with the mutant hunters.
Watching the film, you got a sense of what the titular character’s fate would be early on. Luckily, we were able to see some comedic spars between Logan and Charles we hadn’t been able to see with the Patrick Stewart incarnation of the Professor Xavier character. We got the emotional payoff we deserved during the climax of the film when the dying x-men legend was referred to as dad. The movie alone likely would’ve made the list, but given it’s the culmination of years of torment, layers, blood, sweat, and tears of the live action journey of Wolverine it must take the cake.
Honorable Mention: It: Horrifyingly delicious. Thor: A fun ride that seemed to perfect the formula of GotG 1.
Worst Movie of the Year: Transformers 5. Seriously. Stop supporting these films. Negative 50000 stars. Although, John Cena is going to be in the Bumblebee spinoff….
