Crabicurious.com presents the 2017 Movie Ranking Roundtable. Also check out Bryson's piece and Zack's piece.
By Robert Rixman
Movies are back! It was touch and go for a while, but you heard it here first, 2017 was a great year at the box office. I saw 27 films that were officially released in 2017 and here's how it shook out for me:
Bottom 5 (in order from worst to not as bad):
- The Circle
- 50 Shades Darker
- Baywatch
- Life
- Rough Night
With a thriving media conglomerate with 2 staff writers and so many camera review YouTube videos to watch, I actually do not have as much time as you'd think to go to and watch movies. This means I'm incredibly picky and means I've (luckily) only seen a handful of "bad movies." But The Circle stood above (below) the rest in its awfulness, from Hermoine's American accent to its cringy dialouge, I wouldn't even recommend hate-watching this movie. John Boyega heading to that Casino planet to capture a White Walker was a better idea than John Boyega being in this movie.
Decent But Forgettable (from worst to best):
- Beauty and the Beast
- Kingsman 2: The Golden Circle
- Pitch Perfect 3
- Hidden Figures
- War for the Planet of the Apes
- Kong Skull Island
- Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Some great music in all of these movies, and I did enjoy them all, it was just a really strong field this year. Guardians is mainly this low because of its preseason #1 overall ranking and relative disappointment.
Really Good Movies (from good to really good):
- Baby Driver
- Murder on the Orient Express
- Get Out
- Lady Bird
- Ghost in the Shell
For me, these films had a shared uniqueness, with original premises, stand alone stories, and distinctive protagonists. Unfortunately for them, I don't have a ton of interest in seeing them a second time, but I do recommend people check them out.
Amazing Achivements (from 10th best to 5th best):
- Wonder Woman
- Logan Lucky
- Thor: Ragnarok
- Blade Runner 2049
- Dunkirk
- Logan
I absolutely loved all six of these movies and they still didn't make my top 4?! Turns out 2017 wasn't as boring as everyone's been saying! Bryson and Zack tackled several of these already, but a common thread for me was the incredible trailer-artistry leading to hype, leading to high expectations, leading to met expectations. Logan's trailer felt like an achievement in and of itself with the perfectly paired tune of Johnny Cash's Hurt scratching and ringing along the cuts of an weathered and beaten Wolverine. And of course Led Zeppelin's "Immigrant Song" perfectly set the tone for a new and welcome direction for Marvel spin-offs in Thor: Ragnarok.
Robert's Top 4 Movies of 2017 (from #4 to #1):
- #4 - Star War's Episode VIII: The Last Jedi - I agree with everything Zack said. The highs were higher than any movie this year and overpowered a few dips in the story. As time passes my memory of the throne room fight scene grows a little more foggy, but it feels right to say that it was perhaps a top 5 moment of my life. That feels right.
- #3 - Spider-man: Homecoming - It was a great year for colons in titles! Re-booting a franchise and telling the same origin story for the 3rd time in 15 years is not an idea that gets you in the prestigious top 4 of Crabicurious Year in Reviews... typically. Its a testament to the fun, fast-paced, irreverent adventure Tom Holland as Spider-man took me on that its ranked this highly. Maybe I'm a sucker for movies about the High School Experience since mine was so lame.
- #2 - The Big Sick - The funniest movie of the year also happened to be the most present and poignant, the most heart wrenching, and the best date movie of the year. This may have been the single funniest joke I heard this year.
- #1 - Atomic Blonde - WOAH! Upset alert. Bet you just let Atomic Blonde pass you by. If we were grading on 10 different criteria, it wouldn't be first place in any, but it would be top 3 across the board. The style, editing, cinematography, and music all were mesmerizing. Fellow Crabicurious Founder Leslie Rixman even had this as her number 1 which nobody saw coming. I go to the movies to be entertained and this was one of the most entertaining movies I've ever seen.
